Learning to Love Yourself

Image by Nicolas Messifet

I was reminded of this Derek Walcott poem at a recent talk by Jon Kabat-Zinn, founder of the Western mindfulness movement (and one of my heroes). It seems to embody not just a self-compassionate, mindful attitude, but also the key idea in schema therapy – that to heal our past hurts we must learn to love ourselves, even if we have long held negative, self-limiting/critical beliefs.

Also, it's a beautiful poem – I hope you enjoy it...

Love After Love
The time will come when, with elation
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other's welcome,
and say, sit here. Eat. 

You will love again the stranger who was yourself.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you
all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart. 

Take down the love letters from the bookshelf, 
the photographs, the desperate notes, 
peel your own image from the mirror. 
Sit. Feast on your life.

Warm wishes,

Dan